I know it’s been quiet around here…okay, a little more than quiet (more like ghostly). To be honest, I was feeling like a total failure. I worked so hard to go full time and build this little business of mine, but it just wasn’t working for us. I worked my ass off, day and night – every night. I networked, I spent weekends shooting, and weekdays editing and running it all. I struggled with still missing out on seeing my daughter..I was missing my own memories while I captured memories for others. Business was good, but my fuel tank was running on empty.
With the new year, I made the decision to go back to work full time as a nurse. I know what you’re thinking..”WHAT?! But you JUST went full time!!” I know!! We want to buy a house, so I knew this would be key in paying things off so it would happen as quickly as possible. Initially I planned to just do it until we bought a house, still do photography with the same full time load I had last year, then go full time with photography again. Well…this transition has been one that’s made my family re-evaluate what is truly important to us.
For my whole life, since I was a little girl, all I have ever wanted to be was a mommy. I wanted to be a wife and a momma and that’s it. Well, life doesn’t always work the way we want…and I have to work to help support this family…but I’m a wife and momma just the same.
After returning to working full time as a nurse, I realized how much time photography has taken away from my time with my family. Weekends away shooting, weekdays and evenings spent running the business or editing. Sure, I could hire someone to take some tasks from me…but 1. I’m too controlling for that…and 2. That just takes money from my family…which wasn’t an option with the goals we had set.
Photography, while I love it and it makes me so happy…I’m not seeing my family or friends enough. My husband works evenings and our only time together is weekends – The only reason I’ve seen him this week is because we just got back from vacation…and ya’ll thats just not okay. I need to be nourishing my relationships. I need to be there for my daughters sports activities, for lazy weekends curled up with my love, and for our friends’ babies birthdays. The more I got to participate in, the more I realized that now is just not the right season for me to do photography.
So, here’s what I’ve decided. I didn’t take any portrait sessions for the year, so that worked out. I will finish out the year with the last two weddings I have on the schedule…and will not be taking any photography work for 2018. I have put off making this announcement for way too long.
I’m so so lucky to have been able to work with the most incredible couples and families. I’ve loved this crazy ride…but I am so excited for this next chapter. You haven’t seen the last of me. I’ve considered starting a blog – doing hand lettering – or something else! I’m excited to have time to explore other mediums of art….to spend quality time with my little girl and husband…to live this life I’ve always wanted.